Everyone isn’t a “brain” (you’ll know this term if you were a devoted fan of Daria, like I was), but some people want to look the part, and for those people, I have provided some advice that can make you look like you belong to Mensa…or at least appear to be slightly under qualified to join.
- Listen to classical music.
- Play chess (if you don’t know how, just borrow the rules of checkers, it’s less intelligent game cousin).
- Eat exotic fruits (lychee or dragon fruit). Eating exotic foods makes you look worldly.
- Drive a hybrid (a Prius or Smart car is preferred).
- Read anything about Darwinism or any other scientific theories (put a nice copy of the book cover over your edition of Classical Music for Dummies).
- Wear glasses (you can order a non-prescription pair here).
- Don’t speak, unless it’s necessary, and if you do, try to give short, indirect responses. The less you speak, the more knowledgeable you will appear. Giving indirect responses doesn’t allow people to know exactly what you think.
- Wear sweater vests and khakis as often as possible.
Now that you have the tips to look smart, go on and use them! Show everyone how brilliant you are look!! For good measure, consider wearing penny loafers. With the pennies in them, of course–you don’t wanna look stupid.
